The Value of Education Starts with Mothers
Another school year is upon us, mothers should be determined to show
their children, especially daughters that they support their educational
development and advancement. Girls need moralsupport from their mothers
and fathers (if available) to excel academically as school curriculums
are increasingly challenging. FCAT assessment is not a true assessment
of academic growth and increasingly girls are facing challenges that
should be addressed in school and at home. These actions are becoming
distractions to learning and positive actions and choices at school.
The push is on for more students to graduate from high school and attend
college as academic requirements rise, but additional classroom help is
unavailable to rally round those that are already struggling. Observations
from schools especially in the elementary environment where I’m located
show that more young girls in fifth and sixth grades are satisfied with
not working to their potential and settling for a future working in menial
jobs, having multiple children, and involved in multiple relationships with
men or other women. These are the realities that many teachers see in our
schools and increasingly even in the elementary environment.
Foundations of Love Between Mom and Daughter
Daughters naturally love their mothers, love that is shared is a model
that can blossom into healthy and stable interaction at home and in
school. This relationship promotes academic success, a relationship
with daughters is built on trust and communication (verbal and nonverbal),
a trust that mom will be available to provide support and build self
confidence and self respect. If the father is not present then as for
millions of mothers they provide the necessary support that a father
would. Mothers are aware of the impact they have on their daughter’s
future emotional, psychological and relational development. There should
be honest truth about expectations for what they should be doing to
provide for their daughters. History judge’s mothers by the behavior
of their daughters, and what their choices are in life in relationships,
career choices, and educational accomplishments. Many girls choose someone
like their father for a potential mate, what kind of man a girl will be
involved in is dependant on their parental role models. Mothers must
understand that they are their daughters’ role model for life choices.
As a teacher I have heard young girls in first and second grade talk
about doing the things their mothers do at home, in the clubs and dealing
with men that are boyfriends, lovers, husbands, and even booty calls.
What values and morals do mothers bring to their homes when men are in
and out of the lives of girls? Young girls seeing their mother, auntie,
even grandmothers participating in multiple relationships will follow
behind these actions. It is not my job as an educator to pass judgment,
ridicule, look down on mothers but mothers must realize that their young
daughters will imitate and talk about their home lives at school.
Pointing out the realities of young girls and teens that are in our
classrooms and the behaviors some exhibit. Experts agree that a girl's
future relationships with men are often shaped by both her relationship
with her father and her father's relationships with the mother. How the
mother established relationships with other men and the importance or
stability in a relationship. In broad-brush terms, girls who see their
mothers behaving in certain ways will repeat behaviors, attitudes and
actions at home and in school.
Closer Hearts for Moms and Daughters
Mothers create an opportunity of connection when they spend positive
and productive time together with their daughters. Opportunities such
as going to the park, to get ice cream, going to the beach, going to
church, going for walks to talk. There will be times when your daughter
is older she will reflect and retake these journeys that you share
together that remind her of you and your wisdom. I can attest to these
because that is what my sister misses from our mother since she passed
away. The Bible gives us the key to raising our children in Proverbs 22:6.
"Train a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will
not turn from it". Mothers teach your daughters now that she deserves
respect, teach her now to be confident, teach her now to be independent
and self reliant. Prepare her now for important life decisions. The key
to success is the respect and value that they place on education and
building from it.
A Daughters Educational Needs
The thinking or cognitive process for boys and girls is different in
the classroom and in life. Moms instruct your daughters that they are
smart, intelligent and creative, they are in fact unique and have their
own special gifts. Girls should understand that success is not always
making big sums of money, driving fancy cars or wearing expensive clothes.
Achievement means obtaining a good education to provide for self and
using education as the key to self growth and reliability on personal
skills that are not dependent on others. The Bible says in Hosea 4:6,
"My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge." Guard your daughters
away from negativity, ignorance and guided them to knowledge and
understanding. Malcolm X stated in the past as it applies to the 21st
century, “Education is our passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs
to the people who prepare for it today. "Daughters must be prepared for
the boardrooms, courtrooms, classrooms, conference rooms, presidential
rooms, mayoral rooms, senatorial rooms and surgical rooms. Bob Wise,
President of the Alliance for Excellent Education, “The best economic
stimulus package is a diploma”. As can be seen on many higher educational
campuses women outnumber men. Because of this more doors in business,
technology, politics, science, engineering and medicine are opening up.
Principles of Biblical Power
Don’t wait until disaster or death to teach your daughter about the
power of prayer, praise, worship and attending church, synagogue, mosque,
or chapel. There should be a foundation of spirituality and a time devoted
to worship and prayer. Modeling means attendance to church not just for
the sake of show or entertaining, but for the development and stability
for peace of mind and spirit. Practicing religious discipline and
attendance goes beyond hair styles, dress size, manicure and pedicure,
shoes and hats. Worship is not trying to impress the pastors or priests
or them to get your attention. The worship service is on a spiritual
level not physical. Mothers should encourage and model reading biblical
scripture to your daughters to show the importance of biblical order
in ones life and applying those to relationships. Reading biblical
scripture at an early age develops early communication skills,
cognitive processing and strengthening values, morals and spirituality.
Girls and Healthy Living
A parents teaching are responsible for their child’s sexual
behavior, this is why modeling and education are important.
Duval County has consistently been in the double digits for
AIDS related deaths from 2004 to 2008. In relation to Sexually
Transmitted Disease Duval County is consistent since 2006 (824)
to 2008 (976) cases and increasing. Reports of new HIV cases
have grown from 2006 (208) to 2008 (264). Infant mortality which
has been addressed by E3 Business Group, Inc from past forums
emphasizes that the data be made aware, because any infant death
is too many and in most cases preventable. Mothers must teach
their girls if there is a pregnancy it is important to have neonatal
care as soon as possible to cease any behaviors that are dangerous
to the unborn child and the expectant mother. From 2006 (12.7) to
2008 (13.9) the reports of infant mortality are overwhelming.
Young teen girls are having sex as early as 11 years old and the
ages fluctuate between 12 and 13 for girls engaging in direct
intercourse or oral sex.
Information from JCCI http://www.jcci.org/jcciwebsite/snapshot/atlas.html
Mothers Need Help Too
Mothers are not without available resources to help with their
daughters. As a teacher prevention and proactively addressing
issues, being prepared is better than being taken unaware of failing
grades, unplanned pregnancy, low self esteem or other challenges that
girls will face in their lives. The presence of community organizations
help to redirect, refocus and educate young ladies.
Empowering lifestyles which help in making relevant decisions in
education, community involvement, relationships and career choices.
The wrong choices can have life long dire consequences, and the
correct choices can help with a life filled with success and
achievement. These are just some of the organizations,
but there are many more available that have benefits to girls here in
Boys and Girls Clubs of America - provide both educational and
developmental activities that spark awareness to self confidence,
self respect and direction in careers and educational aspirations.
For more info call Phone: (904) 396-4435 or visit http://www.bgcnf.org/
First Coast Girls Initiative - To build the capacity of individuals and
organizations to serve girls more effectively and efficiently through
gender responsive education and advocacy.
For more info call 904 514-1610 or visit http://www.fcgijax.org/
Girls Incorporated - dedicated to inspiring all girls to be strong, smart,
and bold. Organization dedicated to inspiring all girls to be strong,
smart, and bold. With roots dating to 1864, Girls Inc has provided
vital educational programs to millions of American girls, particularly
those in high-risk, underserved areas.
For more info call (904) 731-9933 or visit http://www.girlsinc.org/find/p7_florida.html
Elexia Moss - Empowerment Resources and the Journey Into Womanhood
Program. To make children and families stronger and empower them to
be successful leaders in the community today, for a better tomorrow. This
grassroots organization provides positive life skills and resources that
foster leadership development and self-sufficiency.
For more info call 904-268-8287 or visit www.empowermentresourcesinc.org
The National Council on Crime and Delinquency (NCCD) Center for Girls and
Young Women - focuses on advocacy, research, assessment services, staff
training and evaluation to address juvenile justice and child welfare systems
that are designed for boys and ill-equipped to meet the gender-specific needs
of girls and young women.
For more info call 904.598.0901 or visit http://www.justiceforallgirls.org/
There are many challenges and distractions for young ladies. Mothers must
be diligent to keep the lines of communication open between themselves and
their children. Daughters require a close relationship with their parents.
Traditionally girls are more vulnerable in many ways than boys, and are in
need of more guidance and to be taught to rely on their cognitive gifts not
physical attributes. Girls are inundated with television and magazine ads
about “how” they are supposed to look, feel, act, interact with others,
and seek to be older, but many girls are not emotionally ready to accept
this behavior, thus displayed in the classroom. A mother is to show their
girls that she is great just the way she is.
Mothers help your daughters make this school year better than the
last year and not to rely just on one test to show how successful she is.
You may be raising the next President, Senator, Supreme Court Justice,
Doctor, Civil Rights Leader or Corporate Executive.
William Jackson and Cheryl Williams